I am a lifelong explorer of rabbit holes.
I never run out of interests to follow
Like, currently trying to solve the biggest problems and researching how to make the world a kinder place. My life has been a series of deep dives—into gender, technology, relationships, and psychology.
Because I’ve stood on the outside of "normal" in so many ways, I’ve learned to value our shared humanity above all else. While I am stepping back from the commercial world of web development, I remain deeply committed to my work in counselling and psychotherapy.
I created this site to invite you in. Whether you are interested as a project collaborator, a potential counselling client, or a local friend who sees the world differently, as I do, I’m glad you’re here.
The Lenses Through Which I See the World
Identities are to me, a shortcut for telling a short story about my experiences and perspective. A way to find and connect with people of shared experience and perspective. My tribe.
Trans Woman
Changing my outward expression of gender was simply the most direct path to being seen and understood. The result? A profound sense of peace and a much happier life. That journey taught me that true well-being begins the moment we stop trying to fit into the moulds society built for us, and start bravely building our own. It gave me a deep, abiding respect for anyone who has the courage to live their truth, and it makes me fiercely supportive of people walking their own unique paths.
Bisexual
While 'bisexual' is a helpful shorthand because I can be attracted to any gender, my actual experience of connection goes much deeper. I’ve found I often have a natural ease with feminine energy, but what truly draws me in is a person's spark. I am attracted to emotional depth, the way a person thinks, and the beautiful dynamic created when people relate well to one another. More than anything, I find myself captivated by people who share my drive to make a positive difference in the world. For me, true connection is less about checking demographic boxes and entirely about meeting mind-to-mind and heart-to-heart.
Sex Worker
Society carries a lot of stigma around sex work, but behind closed doors, it gave me an extraordinary education in human intimacy and vulnerability. It showed me the hidden, often lonely sides of people that polite society tends to ignore. Carrying this perspective means I look at human behaviour with deep compassion rather than surprise. It taught me that beneath it all, we just want to be seen and accepted, and it made me fiercely dedicated to offering that kind of radical acceptance to everyone I meet.
Relationship Anarchist & Polyamorous
I value the freedom to relate to people authentically, without the heavy cognitive load of managing social expectations that clash with my values.
I believe there is often a disconnect between how society tells us to love and what actually feels natural. Because of this, I choose to step away from default relationship scripts. I prioritise connections based on mutual value rather than assuming romance trumps friendship. I choose consensual, open intimacy with multiple people over the unrealistic expectations of strict monogamy. Ultimately, I don't believe relationships should be one-size-fits-all; I prefer to tailor every connection to perfectly suit the people in it.
Humanist
I believe that we don't need an external rulebook to know how to be good to one another; our sense of right and wrong is grounded in our natural ability to feel compassion. Being a humanist means accepting the responsibility of making our own meaning in life. It’s about celebrating humanity in all its messy diversity, protecting our personal freedoms, and remembering that we are deeply interconnected. We have a duty of care not just to the people in front of us, but to future generations and the natural environment we share. Even when things are complex, I trust that we have the internal resources to navigate it all together.
Neurospicy
Rather than spending thousands of dollars chasing a medical diagnosis to explain why my mind works differently, I just embrace being 'neurospicy.' It’s an affirming way to say my brain doesn't always follow the standard operating manual, and I wouldn't have it any other way, even if I sometimes get too excited and distracted by new ideas. Experiencing the world differently has taught me to celebrate how beautifully diverse human minds are. More importantly, it means I am a safe harbour for others who feel they have to hide their quirks to fit in; with me, you can just be exactly as you are.
Domestic Violence Survivor
Living through psychological abuse shattered my reality and my trust in people for a time. It’s an experience that permanently changes how you view the world—something that usually only another survivor truly gets. But that pain has been the catalyst for immense post-traumatic growth. Because I have navigated my way out of that darkness, I am not easily shocked or frightened by the pain of others. It has made me fiercely protective of emotional safety and deeply committed to holding a non-judgmental space for anyone trying to rebuild their own sense of self-worth.
Services I offer in line with my values and hopefully yours too
Counselling and Psychotherapy
Driven by affective empathy and a strong desire to reduce suffering, I have qualified as a counsellor with a growing specialisation in LGBTIA+ (Sex, Gender and Sexuality Affirming), Narcissistic Abuse (and other Pathological Relationships), Loneliness (Meaning, Belonging and Intimacy), Couples Therapy (using The Gottman Method) and Polyamory (& other Ethical Non-monogamies). This also comes from lived experience in bisexuality, gender transition, polyamory, sex work, trauma and emotional abuse. I counsel online Australia-wide and Walk-and-Talk & In-Home for those who live nearby
Projects which feed my drive for purpose and meaning
The areas that inspire me most are Human Connection, our Biosphere, Ending unnecessary Suffering, Diversity and Science. I’m also a problem solver at heart so when I see something that challenges or gets in the way of the well-being of life on earth, I want to solve it. Below is what I’ve either got on the go at the moment or coming up soon.
Global Wellbeing
Culture, including technology, has improved our well-being immensely over the past 100,000 years, but well-being still lags well behind our societal capacity for most people. Most people should be better off and happier than they are. How about a new evidence-based system, growing within but not challenging current systems until it performs better than existing systems? Adoption of new systems will mean letting go of some of the beliefs that keeps our thinking rigid, maintaining inefficient systems that leave so many behind and thankfully we already have some tools that will support this process.
Human Diversity
Over an evolutionary period of competing for scarce resources, we have developed an innate bias to discriminate and fear those from other groups. This has left human diversity undervalued and under-utilised in a time when resources needed for our survival are not so scarce. Just as we learn to increase our value for non-violent solutions to conflict, we can also learn to increase our value for human diversity by recognising the value diversity brings.